Do you have another battery you can slap in there and try? One that hasn't been sitting for so long. I've had junk batteries that showed a charge but didn't work. Not real common I don't think but it'd be one more thing to rule out.
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Yeah, just cause it has volts doesn't mean it can handle the load...
And if it's an Optima, then you know your just ****ed.
What brand battery is it anyway?- Brian Meissen
Owner, MiFBody.com
Administrator, LTxTech.com

1994 Camaro LT1 Transplant -
357ci LT1, cammed, stalled, and driven. 
2022 Camaro LT1 - "Cherry Bomb 2"Michigan FBody Meet & Greet Car Show 2022
June 4th, 2022 - 9am to 3pm!!!
The HUB Stadium, Auburn Hills, MI
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Do you know what batteries he's using? If it's an Optima, that's probably the problem. Those things suck.
(Coming from the person who is running an optima right now)- Brian Meissen
Owner, MiFBody.com
Administrator, LTxTech.com

1994 Camaro LT1 Transplant -
357ci LT1, cammed, stalled, and driven. 
2022 Camaro LT1 - "Cherry Bomb 2"Michigan FBody Meet & Greet Car Show 2022
June 4th, 2022 - 9am to 3pm!!!
The HUB Stadium, Auburn Hills, MI
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Hmm Never had any problems with my red top Brian, granted i've only had it for a couple years, What don't you like about it?
2001 Bright Rally Red Camaro SS - M6, Livernois Stage 3 ported 243 heads, Livernois 230/236 114 LSA cam, FRPP 36# injectors, Ported TB, SLP MAF, Volant CAI, Kooks 1 3/4 headers & ORY, GMMG Cat-back. Koni SA 4/3's, BMR springs, Founders Performance, STB, LCA's and Panhard bar.
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If you ever drain the battery low enough that it won't start your car, contrary to them saying "Oh it's fine, you can recharge it" - it won't work as good ever again. I'm on my 4th optima red top - My first optima red top that I bought back when I got the car lasted for like 5 years, but then the second battery I bought only lasted about 2 years, and then I ended up having it replaced under warranty. Another 2 years later and it had to be replaced again under warranty. Wouldn't hold a charge. If they drain down low enough, you have to do a special procedure to recharge the battery but even that won't guarantee it will hold a charge after that. Because I know I have parasitic draw on my car while the car is off and parked, I actually have an inline switch next to my battery that I flip if the car is going to sit for more than 12 hours. Keeps the battery from draining down, so this 4th Optima I am planning to keep charged.Originally posted by Dummybait View PostHmm Never had any problems with my red top Brian, granted i've only had it for a couple years, What don't you like about it?- Brian Meissen
Owner, MiFBody.com
Administrator, LTxTech.com

1994 Camaro LT1 Transplant -
357ci LT1, cammed, stalled, and driven. 
2022 Camaro LT1 - "Cherry Bomb 2"Michigan FBody Meet & Greet Car Show 2022
June 4th, 2022 - 9am to 3pm!!!
The HUB Stadium, Auburn Hills, MI
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Thanks for explaining Brian, its been a good battery so far, but then again, alot of things are great until they break lol..
2001 Bright Rally Red Camaro SS - M6, Livernois Stage 3 ported 243 heads, Livernois 230/236 114 LSA cam, FRPP 36# injectors, Ported TB, SLP MAF, Volant CAI, Kooks 1 3/4 headers & ORY, GMMG Cat-back. Koni SA 4/3's, BMR springs, Founders Performance, STB, LCA's and Panhard bar.
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"Bad Igntion Switch: If your battery checks out, but the starter is still silent, it may be a faulty ignition switch. Turn the key to the on position (not all the way to start). If the red warning lights on your dash don't light up (and your battery connections are clean), the ignition switch is bad. If they do light up, turn the key to the start position. The dash warning lights should turn off at this key position (most cars). If you're not sure, turn on the headlights. When you try to start the car, the lights should either dim (a lot) or turn off completely. If they do, your ignition switch should be ok."
I had this problem with my 88 camaro and this was the culprit. Hope it helps.sigpic
1988 Chevy Camaro- 400 sbc, Ls1 rear 3.23 gears, T5. body work in progress
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Battery is an energizer. It wouldn't turn on the gauges with jumper cables attached to it either.sigpic
Ambitious but Rubbish
Even in the Slomaro (Bessy), a Squeeling Tire is a Happy Tire.
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Lmao at your screen name!
When I asked you if the security light was flashing, it was the BCM that i was asking about... because thats a *****. Will you be home tomorrow night? I can stop by.
Do you get 2 sets of keys with the car?-Joel
1995 Z28 M6 - AI226/234 - autocross ricer
1984 Scottsdale K10 - 305/4bbl/4spd

WTB List:Midwest Chasis DS Loop
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Post your writeup?Originally posted by nascarnate326 View Postonly for noobs

Im glad im a "newb" to that experience. Hope it never happens!-Joel
1995 Z28 M6 - AI226/234 - autocross ricer
1984 Scottsdale K10 - 305/4bbl/4spd

WTB List:Midwest Chasis DS Loop
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I'll take all the help I can get. Battery is good. Grounds are good. Headlights, hatch release, dome lights, chime all work. None of the functions that require the key to be turned on are functioning including windows and radio... or dash.sigpic
Ambitious but Rubbish
Even in the Slomaro (Bessy), a Squeeling Tire is a Happy Tire.
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I am getting power to both the ignition fuse under the hood as well as the ignition fuse on the driver side dash when the key is turned. I guess that eliminates the ignition switch. What else can it be?sigpic
Ambitious but Rubbish
Even in the Slomaro (Bessy), a Squeeling Tire is a Happy Tire.
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